Tom Baker, Ebbw Vale

Some wonderful Christians have already written here, perhaps you feel so unworthy in comparison! Well, that’s exactly how I feel as I write this but by the grace of God I am what I am; a sinner still, but a saved sinner. No more, no less, a dirty sinner saved by God’s grace and made clean by the blood of His beautiful Son.

Which verses would you take to the desert island?

O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know my sitting down and my rising up…How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand; When I awake, I am still with You… Psalm 139

I’m often quite aware of my own sinfulness. I wallow in guilt most days. And so I should, shouldn’t I? I mean, my behaviour is hardly good enough. My thoughts are bad, and they are often followed by bad actions. My heart is wicked, and I feel so dirty. And the holy God, has searched me and known me (v1). Gutted. In fact David goes on to tell me that God knows everything there is to know about me. When my own sinful heart can tell that I’m a sinner, what will a holy God think of me? But rather, His thoughts to me are precious (v17). Though I sin constantly, the Lord thinks about me! In His sight I am blameless because His own Son has carried all my sin, guilt and shame and been punished in my place. So often my last thought as I drop off to sleep at night is, “I must have gone too far this time, I must have failed too many times to be a real Christian. I’ve sinned unforgivably, surely God will leave me now.” I fall asleep fearing that I have no hope of being right with God. Then I wake up, and find that He is still with me (v18). He’s not left me yet and He never will. What a patient Saviour He is!

Have mercy upon me, O God, according to Your lovingkindness; according to the multitude of Your tender mercies, blot out my transgressions…Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow…Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me…The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart—
These, O God, You will not despise… Psalm 51

This Psalm is said to follow a particularly low point in the life of David. You know the story, He gets another man's wife pregnant and has him killed to cover it up. He knew that what he’d done was wrong, and he knew that God was angry with him. More often than not, my own feelings of shame come after I’ve done things that I know are bad. My only hope is that God would be merciful to a sinner like me (v1). I feel dirty, I must have Him make me clean (v7). My heart is battered and broken, and it’s my own stupid fault. I really hate myself sometimes. But God doesn’t. He doesn’t despise people who are broken hearted over their sin (v17). I sometimes believe the lie that He does hate me for what I’ve done, or rather that He must hate me! But seeing me in this sorry state, He is driven to the deepest compassion. “Christ has regarded my helpless estate, and has shed His own blood for my soul!” He creates in me a clean heart (v10), He changes my sinful, broken heart into a clean, whole one. He’s doing that in me every day, even on the days when I really can’t feel it.

Behold, My Servant shall deal prudently; He shall be exalted and extolled and be very high…But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed... All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned, every one, to his own way; and the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all…Therefore I will divide Him a portion with the great, and He shall divide the spoil with the strong, because He poured out His soul unto death, and He was numbered with the transgressors, and He bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors. Isaiah 52:13 – 53:12

It’s refreshing to often remind myself of how Jesus Christ has dealt with my sin. God hasn’t just overlooked it, He’s dealt with it. My sin has all been punished in Jesus, and this chapter is my favourite description of that. Jesus Christ, the holy Son of God, King of the Universe, Glorious God, has become a Man and in His body has carried all my sins and sorrows! He endured shame, accusation, trial, punishment, and death, all of which should have been mine. He bore the anger which His Father had towards me and my sin. By Christ’s wounds, I am healed (v5). The Lord has laid on Christ all of my sin (v6). No wonder the apostle Paul would say later that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1)! Even now, when I feel quite sinful in myself, Jesus Christ makes intercession for me (v12).

Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me… And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also… John 14

This wonderful Saviour has risen from the dead and gone to heaven now. Though I know Him, and He is always nearby His Spirit, I look forward to the day when I see Him face to face. Before He left, Jesus told His disciples that He would go and prepare a place for them, and therefore would be coming back for them to take them there (v3). Likewise, Jesus is preparing a place for me, so one day I know He’s coming back to take me there. While still on earth I often feel distant from God, but then I will be “forever with the Lord” (1 Thessalonians 4:17). So much of my life bears so little resemblance to His, but when I see Him as He is I will be made completely like Him (1 John 3:2). On that day I will have already had my last bad thought, my body will be glorified, my heart will love Christ purely and my soul will know how clean it really is. I do hope He comes back soon.

Who would you like to find on the island for company?

If I may break the no-Bible-characters rule, I’ll go for the apostle John. First of all he must have picked up some desert island skills on Patmos. But more than that, it would be so good to sit and listen to him talk about his friend, the Lord Jesus, whom he loved so much. I believe the thing that never stopped amazing him was that Jesus loved him, and that’s the kind of company I’d like to keep.

Which song would you take to the island?

Do I seriously only get one song? Dear me. I’ll answer for now with a 1738 piece by Charles Wesley but next week my answer will probably be different.

And can it be that I should gain
An interest in the Savior's blood?
Died He for me, who caused His pain?
For me, who Him to death pursued?
Amazing love! how can it be
That Thou, my God, should die for me?

'Tis mystery all! The Immortal dies!
Who can explore His strange design?
In vain the firstborn seraph tries
To sound the depths of love divine!
'Tis mercy all! let earth adore,
Let angel minds inquire no more.

He left His Father's throne above,
So free, so infinite His grace;
Emptied Himself of all but love,
And bled for Adam's helpless race;
'Tis mercy all, immense and free;
For, O my God, it found out me.

Long my imprisoned spirit lay
Fast bound in sin and nature's night;
Thine eye diffused a quickening ray,
I woke, the dungeon flamed with light;
My chains fell off, my heart was free;
I rose, went forth and followed Thee.

No condemnation now I dread;
Jesus, and all in Him is mine!
Alive in Him, my living Head,
And clothed in righteousness divine,
Bold I approach the eternal throne,
And claim the crown, through Christ my own.